Duke Nukem: The New Sonic

A funny this happened these past two weeks: I’ve been playing a horrible game apparently. Yes, I have been playing a game that has gotten review ratings such as; 2 /10, 5.5/10, so on. Well damn, I guess that means I love bad games right? Oh yes, and remember Sonic Adventure? I love that game too, it’s said to be a bad game as well. But for some reason it received 90% marks when it first came out. Yet it is said it hasn’t aged well, and looks and plays terrible. Somewhere along the line, a time traveling gnome went and changed Sonic Adventure to make it a bad game, but forgot to erase all the old reviews. Apparently, games like Ocarina of Time age perfectly, and still hold to today’s standards. Yet it looks like absolute shit by today’s standards, but that’s ok right, because graphics don’t matter. Or wait, they do. Huh?

Anyway, the bad game I’ve been playing is Duke Nukem Forever. Unfortunately for me, as usual, my opinion is different than the crowd and I do not think Duke Nukem Forever is anywhere near a bad game. It’s not however a masterpiece, but it certainly also does’nt deserve such low marks as a current 45% on game rankings. You know what that is lower than? Postal 2. You can tell me DNF isn’t a great game, but you cannot tell me it is worse than Postal 2.

So this brings me to a thought; Duke Nukem is the new Sonic the Hedgehog.

Sonic games are getting better. We’ve recently seen the releases of Sonic 4, and Sonic Colours, and people are now hyping Sonic Generations. This is good news for everyone except the people who love to hate Sonic, who need someone new to bash now that their criticisms of Sonic are getting more and more suspect.

Again, while I don’t think the 2000’s Sonic games are fantastic, they certainly aren’t in the 2/ 10 category. 2006’s Sonic The Hedgehog was released to horrendous reviews and criticism, but do you know what I thought? It was a damn hard game. You know what were hard games? The Genesis Sonic games. There is a part in Sonic 2, where you need to jump perfectly or you will fall into a pit of water and die. There is also these parts in 2006’s Sonic The Hedgehog. Yeah, the game is unfair, but that seems to be how the game is anyway. Sonic Unleashed was also like this, but a bit more refined. I’ll agree the Werehog stages weren’t ideal, but the game as a whole was pretty decent. It was frustrating, just like God of War.

Another odd complaint I see for various games including Sonic is story and characters. Apparently after being treated with no storyline whatsoever in the original Sonic games, fans do not want the series to evolve in any form whatsoever, and want a clone of the original games. You know the solution to that problem? Play the old games.

Sure, everyone hates Tails, but we love to hate him. Sonic 2 wouldn’t feel complete without him. Sonic 3 wouldn’t feel complete without Knuckles. Sonic Adventure wouldn’t feel complete without the likes of Amy or Big. As games evolve, an important part of them is making them seem more like cinema and less of just a simple distraction. It is an art form and it must constantly evolve. This also can make the classics more entertaining. If there was no evolution, the classics wouldn’t be classics.

Now, back to Duke Nukem Forever.

Evolution was a key part in DNF, and while you play it, you see it. It spent 15 years in development-I’m not sure why people keep saying 12– and every part of the game is an evolution through those 15 years. It is almost a museum in itself, you can pick apart each generation of evolution and hate or appreciate it.
I purposely stayed away from hype, previews, and reviews until I myself played the game. I installed the game on the PC, and went into it blind. And you know what? I love it.

The graphics are fine; there are a few hiccups, but when people complain about it looking like its from 2010, I just sigh and feel sorry for them. The gameplay is great; it’s fun, exciting and hilarious. It has modern health systems and gun play, so I’m not sure the complaint there. I guess people were expecting a genre changer, which Duke never was. I’ll have a full review out in the coming month/s, so I’ll pick it apart more then.

The key word I said in the last paragraph, though, was “fun”. The game is FUN. That is what Duke Nukem 3D was, that is what Duke Nukem Forever is. It IS indeed the evolution of Duke Nukem 3D, love it or hate it.

The original game wasn’t exactly a genre pusher, it was a fun game that in turn made fun of everything else. What does Duke Nukem Forever do? The same, but it is the evolution of it. I keep saying this, but not explaining.

Lets look at the main complaints, with my quick responses.

“Duke Nukem’s quips get old quick, and are stolen from other media.”. – Apparently it took these people 15 years to realise this, weren’t annoyed by it in Duke Nukem 3D, and didn’t know Duke Nukem himself is a parody.

“The turret sequences are last-gen, and get old quick.” – So, there isn’t any turrets in Call of Duty, or Halo?

“The humour is tasteless and low-brow” – This is the evolution of Duke Nukem 3D, I’m sure if the technology had been there in 1995, it would have been more or less the same. In the same review, the reviewer in turn praises Bulletstorm’s juvenile energy. I guess these people must hate South Park as well right? They are also the same people who draw penises on the whiteboards in their video reviews.

“The shrunk-down platforming sections feel old” – I’m sorry that every game can’t follow the run-to-the-next-section-to-hide-behind-a-wall-and-shoot-endless-terrorists formula.

It’s quite odd how this generation seems obsessed with retro-style games and remakes, yet bash new games for feeling old. In the world of Call of Duty, Halo, and Gear of War, there is no room for games that are different. And really, Duke Nukem Forever is indeed different, and stands out from the pack. Yet for reviewers, a game must be like the current trend or it is deemed bad. And now the current trend seems to be hating on Duke Nukem. Congratulations Sonic on surviving the 2000’s ridicule.

A friend of mine finds it curious as to why I am so in love with retro games, apart from them being cheaper, I believe I’ve finally found my proper answer: New games lack originality in my eyes. Don’t get me wrong, I still like to play new games, and fully enjoy them, but at the end of the day I’d prefer to go home to Gunstar Heroes, than Gears of War. Or Wolfenstein 3D, over Halo. Or Mickey Mania, opposed to Ratchet and Clank. I’m still finding new, great games of old and most of what comes out today looks the same to me. But it’s just personal preferance.

Duke Nukem Forever isnt a genre changer, but to me the last game that pushed boundries was Deus Ex. It isn’t a masterpiece, it is what it is. its not his worst game and also not his best. It’s just Duke Nukem, and its fun as hell. I’ve already blabbered enough so perhaps I should end it here, but I may write another if I see Duke Nukem win any “worst game” awards.